How My Bucket List Sprang a Leak, and “What” Plugs the Hole
Reflecting on how things, trips, and treasures can take our eyes off of life’s true prize: Doing life with people
Hi beautiful being,
A few weeks ago, I felt pretty down. It was like the world had lost its color. The thing is, though—on the surface—my partner and I are living our dream. This year, Lisa got a job that sent us from our home in Poulsbo, Washington to Europe for 3-5 years. In eleven months alone, we’ve spent time in Sicily, Scotland, France, Greece, Montenegro, Croatia, Bosnia-Herzegovina, Germany, and England. Between her job, and the compensation and disability I receive because of an accident that severely injured me in 2008, we’re quite literally getting paid to live our bucket list.
So, why was I blue then?
I was lonely. I felt disconnected, adrift from, and out of touch with my family and friends. And, you know what, friend? That’s the kind of malady walking by the Eiffel Tower, seeing the Mona Lisa in person, witnessing the majestic beauty of the Scottish Highlands, and visiting ancient Greek and Roman ruins can’t cure. Do you know what I mean?
Just a few days ago, something Peloton instructor Ben Alldis said while I took a streaming spin class from him, really helped me connect the dots concerning what was going on in me. I realized:
People are at the heart of a bucket list. It’s empty and rings hollow without them.
(Lisa and I with her daughter Tiffany and her BFF Jenny in Caltagirone, Sicily)
Let’s think about it this way. Generally speaking, are the best moments in your life alone, or with someone? I know for me, nearly all of them occurred with friends and family. What is more, in honestly reflecting on those amazing times when I was by myself—it occurs to me, what made them incredible was the powerful connection I had with Spirit, and/or the thread of Love that links us all together.
On the heels of Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and Giving Tuesday, this leads me to a broader point. First, though, can I pause and ask: When did Black “Friday” become a week-long endeavor? Was I the only one bombarded by hundreds of emails—and a good number of text messages—for these three events? Did anyone else find these nonstop messages to spend, spend, spend; save, save, save; and give, give, give, crazy making—and troubling at a deep level?
(All pics are in Caltagirone, Sicily by Tiffany Demers)
What I’m getting at—and know I personally struggle with on the daily—is:
While there is nothing inherently wrong with money, possessions, vacations, and the like. Unless we’re careful, it’s all too easy for them to distract us from remembering and doing what matters most: Connecting with, caring for, and helping out—or being helped by—people. Real, flesh-and-blood people.
Lisa’s eldest daughter, Tiffany, visiting us with her best friend—really drove this home for me. They joined us in Sicily for a week, and we had the time of our lives. Even though we’d already been to Taormina and Siracusa together, getting to see them with my stepdaughter and Jenny was next-level awesomeness. What is more, in the end, the very best part of them being here—was simply getting to be with them, no matter what we were doing. We had several delightful evenings just hanging out in our living room playing games or watching Christmas movies!
(From Inspiring Quotes)
Tiff and Jenny, thank you for plugging the holes in my bucket list, and reminding me:
People are the sweet spice of life.
What do you think, friend? What stood out to you? How can my musings apply to your life? Do you have any experiences this brought to mind? I can’t wait to hear from you in the comments!
Hugs & Love,
Lang (aka “Dr. Love”)
P.S. Did you know that clicking the “like” button 🤍 helps other people find this post—while bringing a smile to my face? Also, if you think this could aid anyone, please consider sharing and/or “restacking” it. And above all, remember: You are amazing, and I hope you have a beautiful day!