The “Answer” is Inside of You

I find viewing everything as our teacher to be an endlessly helpful mentality. That’s how my Apple Watch dying, ended up reminding me that the “answer” is inside of you.

Hi beautiful being,

My partner and I love to take walks together. We’ll hold hands, chat, enjoy the scenery, and often listen to (and talk about) a podcast by splitting my AirPods between us. It’s a lovely ritual, which I believe, draws us closer together.

We both have Apple Watches, so as we set out, typically ask one another, “do you have your walking started?” Then, at the end of our stroll, Lisa and I will compare how far our watches say we’ve each gone. Do you want to know something crazy about this, friend? Nine times out of ten—even though we’ve literally been with one another every step of the way—her watch says she went farther than mine. I kid you not!

It's become a bit of an ongoing joke. If Lisa has to stop for a moment, for instance, I’ll often walk circles around her, proclaiming that, “it’s only so I can keep pace with your cheating watch.” Not that it ends up mattering in the end. LOL.

(I adore the dragon on my watch. 🤩 I think I should name him. Any ideas?)

We also occasionally jest about how “vital” it is to track your workouts on your watch. Because, as we all know ;), if you don’t turn your device on to measure the duration of and calories you burned while working out—it’s basically like you didn’t work out at all!

More frequently, one of us will start waiving our arm around at 50-minutes passed the hour. As that’s when the watch will remind you, “it’s time to stand”, if it doesn’t think you have yet that hour. Isn’t interesting how closing your rings for the day is such a thing?

This leads to a bigger question, which leads to an even bigger query. Namely:

How much of our power do you and I give away to our smart watch—and/or other devices—by letting them tell us whether we were “successful” today or not?

(The viewing for my dead watch.)

Followed by …

How much of our power—as in one’s agency and energy—do you and I give away to all manner of people and things? From partners to presidents, television shows we binge to our favorite sports teams, social media to video games, our weight on a scale to the numbers in our bank account, and so on. Whose “hands”, that are not our own, do you and I place our flourishing in?

That said, I do want to pause to note something. Giving your power away is not an inherently “bad” thing. In many ways, it’s quite beautiful … when done mindfully and purposefully to bless and benefit others. What I’m getting at here is the more subtle and subconscious ways you and I let our agency and energy bleed away.

To be honest, my Apple Watch dying a few weeks ago is what got me reflecting on all of this. Mainly, because I have to admit, its black screen of death resulted in (at least) a little freaking out inside of me. I mean, how else was I going to know if I’d met my daily fitness goals, whether I’d achieved the golden standard of 10,000 steps that day, or was a healthy person?

As crazy, yet hopefully normal (please tell me I’m not alone in this) as this sounds; when I peak under the proverbial covers to look at all the things I give my agency and energy away to, it’s somewhat horrifying! Things like:

Whether you’ll “like”, comment on, and/or share this.

My weight on the scale.

How many people will sign up for the on-demand yoga subscription I’m launching soon.

Fretting over when the Seattle Mariners will finally get to the World Series, as well as if the Seattle Seahawks will progress from being pretty good, to pretty great.

Checking my email twenty times a day.

Getting to the proverbial next level on a video game I enjoy.

Wondering why some people on Substack and social media get SO many more responses and reactions than I do.

While I could go on and on, I’m curious: What do you give your agency and energy away to?

In sitting with my list, as well as the things I thought of but didn’t write out, something hit me.

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When I give my power to something, or someone, I’m giving “it” a measure of control over me. Whatever you and I hand our agency and energy to, has some degree of rulership over us. In that we’re allowing it to determine and dictate our level of success, worth, and belonging. From that vantage point, one could even say we sometimes turn our smart watches, scales, bank accounts, social media, and even bibles, into false “gods”.

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Given that the access point to the Divine is within you and I, this brings me to a simple proposal.

What if, instead of finding the guidance for, and measurement of, our success and wellness outside ourselves—we found it within us?

In that regard, while closing your rings can definitely be helpful; feeling good in your body is the real marker of physical health. Likewise, although the leader of your country may promise to make things great for you; the wisdom that knows the actual path to your flourishing, is inside of you. What is more, while I’m not going to knock unwinding and relaxing in the evening by watching a good show. I will say the peace and quiet we long to feel inside ourselves, doesn’t come in any lasting way by sitting on the couch and watching the television. We gain that inner wholeness and freedom through things like meditation, yoga, contemplation, and being in nature.

The “answer” is inside of you.

Friend, you are amazing! What did this stir up for you? Where can you take your power back, so to speak? We can’t wait to hear from you in the comments! And please “like” 🤍, and consider sharing/restacking this post if it spoke to you.

Hugs & Love,

Lang (aka “Dr. Love”)