How "Duolingo" is Trying to Ruin My Life

Our increasing understanding of what makes humans tick is both a blessing & a curse. The key is to be aware of how this knowledge is being used to suck you in, & make conscious choices accordingly.

Hi beautiful being,

Darth Vader just walked by, and posed for a selfie with a kid, before striding away down the hall. With thoughts of galactic domination on his mind, no doubt! I do have to say, I was pretty shocked by how much shorter he is in person than on the big screen. ;) Still, I’m pretty sure getting to pose with someone dressed up as the Dark Lord of the Sith, made that kid’s day. I mean, he merely waived at me, and I thought that was pretty cool!

I’m writing this in a common area just outside the gym on Sigonella Naval Air Station, Sicily. Apparently, the spot I like to work at when I’m on base, is also where a number of kids go to hangout after school. Although it definitely doesn’t make for optimal writing conditions; it is what it is, and when I dislike or resist reality, I lose 100% of the time.

That said, I do have my AirPods in with Matt Nathanson playing to block out the chaos. After all, while I can’t control others, I do have voice and choice when it comes my words and deeds.

My partner and I have been here in Sicily for the better part of the last sixteen months. She’s a civil servant for the U.S. navy, and got a 3 to 5-year gig here starting last January. That said, several months before that—when Lisa found out she got the assignment—we started learning Italian on Duolingo.

Have you tried the app? I have to say, it really is a fun way to learn, relearn, or practice a foreign language. And, it’s also a bit addictive. I’m pretty sure this is because Duolingo’s creators really know what makes people tick.

More specifically, they tap into our desire to feel good. Duolingo has this brilliant system of rewards, encouragement, progression, teamwork, and competition—which combine to leave you feeling accomplished, satisfied, and longing for more. Basically, the app gives a user regular hits of dopamine, the “feel good” hormone that brings us pleasure.

Now, while this is beneficial for learning; in that it makes studying enjoyable and exciting. It can also result in a person chasing the next “hit”, and wondering how ten minutes suddenly became an hour—or more. Not that I know this from firsthand experience.

Most mornings, I walk up and down the long hall in our house to get my steps in, while I do Duolingo. Every day, it gives you three goals to accomplish—which are part of a monthly challenge—so, I try and knock those out. While doing so, each time I get five or ten-in-a-row correct, it celebrates me. Then, at the end of each lesson (which are generally 3 to 7-minutes), whether I score 50% or 100%, Duolingo congratulates me like I’m a rockstar.

What’s more, Duo has a point system and leaderboard, and each time I get enough points to move up the ladder, it champions my feat—while also encouraging me to keep going. One of the ways it helps motivate me to do so, is by doubling the points I score for 10 to 15-minutes after I accomplish one of my daily goals. And, as if that wasn’t enough, after I finish all 3 daily goals, it gives me an even bigger scoring bonus! An attempt to keep me “playing” all morning, and ruin my life no doubt.

Now don’t get me wrong. I have nothing against Duolingo, and actually think it’s a great way to learn. The day I realized how it subtly “pulls my strings”, though, opened my eyes to how this sort of thing happens to us all the time. And since:

Becoming aware of an issue enables us to understand what’s going on. Which then, empowers us to make conscious choices concerning what we want to do about it.

I knew I wanted write to y’all about this.

Many apps, like the romance one my partner and I are enjoying, use the same principles. Often, this gets tailored to our specific preferences—both from the way you and I use that specific program, as well as what it gleans from our use of other apps.

Streaming services, like Netflix, do much the same. Offering up for us on a proverbial silver platter, the content it believes will make us feel good enough to keep watching … and watching … and watching.

What is more, social media is all about giving us not only the dopamine hits that come from likes, loves, and so on; but also, the adrenaline that comes from posts and comments that frustrate, anger, and baffle us. Do you know what I mean friend?

Television news has long known how to dramatize things in ways that scare, move, trigger, inspire, and anger us. You know how in the Star Wars movies, Yoda and Obi-Wan warn Luke about the lure of the dark side of the Force? Telling him how the anger, fear, and hate it features are seductive and addictive. It turns out, this is a truth about the human condition that television news shows, as well as politicians, play upon and benefit from—all the time.

With all of this in mind, I’d like to leave you with a blessing.

When an app, show, or stream starts to suck us in—may we step-back, and consciously choose whether we really want to keep going or not.

When we’re tempted by the intoxicating energies of fear, frustration, and anger—may we instead, follow the lead of love.

May your one wild and beautiful life, be rich with joy, full of compassion, carried by wisdom, woven with peace, and overflowing with love.

Friend, I’m truly grateful for, and hope this post blessed you! What did it stir up in you? Did this shed light on anything in your life that you’d like to shift? How do you create a healthy relationship with apps, social media, etc.? I can’t wait to hear from you in the comments! And please “like” 🤍, and consider sharing/restacking this post if it spoke to you.

Hugs & Love,

Lang (aka “Dr. Love”)